Mao Mao: Heroes of Pure Heart Wiki
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This is a transcribed copy of Mao Mao's Nakey.
Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
Previous: "Sleeper Sofa" Next: "Lucky Ducky Mug"
Speaker Dialogue
Mao Mao I've gathered you all here today -- You getting this, Gary?
Gary Sure am!
Mao Mao I've gathered you here today to witness true legendary greatness. Today, I will climb to the very tippy top of the highest point in Pure Heart Valley -- the Ruby Pure Heart Spire. I'll take that applause now.
Adorabat Yay! You're so cool, Mao Mao!
Mao Mao Thank you. Thank you, thank you. You're too kind.
Badgerclops This sounds more like a you thing, and less of, like, an us thing.
Mao Mao Badgerclops, climbling the Ruby Pure Heart Spire has never been done before. This is our chance for people to see me -- Uh, I mean, us -- the way I want them to see us -- as legends.
Badgerclops No way, man. It's crazy windy up there.
Mao Mao A little wind can't blow out the legendary fire that burns in my heart!
Badgerclops It's a bad idea, man. The wind speeds are so high up there they'd blow the clothes clean off you, or...Mmm. Ah. So good.
Mao Mao There's more back at HQ. I'll let you have the rest if you climb to the top of the Ruby Pure Heart with me.
Badgerclops Hold up. I'm having a moment. Mmm. Okay. Boom! Did it!
Mao Mao I said "climb," not "grapple"!
Adorabat My turn.
Mao Mao I said "climb" -- not "fly," not "grapple," "climb"!
Adorabat What did he say?
Badgerclops I don't know. It's too windy up here to hear him. Want to go back to sheriff's HQ, eat more doughnuts, and play with toasters all afternoon?
Adorabat Okay. See you at home, Mao Mao!
Mao Mao Fine! I'll do it alone! Hey! Keep filming. I'm going solo. I'm used to doing stuff alone. I've accomplished many feats alone, and by myself. No! Stop crying! You're a hero, remember? That's what you want people to see. Ah! Dumb bird! Get out of here! Made it. Look at me! I'm legendary! Oh! This must be the wind Badgerclops warned me about. Little does he know that wind only makes me look more heroic. Whoa! Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! No! No, no! No! Ah! No! Ah! No, no, no, no, no, no! I'm nakey! No. Legends aren't taken seriously when they're nakey. The whole town will laugh at my weird neck and my lack of a tail. I'm nothing without my cool clothes.
Clothes So, have you learned your lesson?
Mao Mao Uh-huh. I should have listened to Badgerclops when he said it was a bad idea to climb the Ruby Pure Heart.
Clothes Yep. Now get out there, and see where we blew off to. Come on. You can do it.
Mao Mao Right. Thanks for the pep talk, imaginary clothes!
Clothes No problem! Say, uh, can I borrow your phone for a minute?
Mao Mao What? No! Get out of here! Go on! Alright. Time to find my real clothes. If only I hadn't left my binoculars in my belt -- is what I'd say if I were a dumb-dumb! Always prepared. Alright. Let's see. Hmm. Not in the park. Doesn't look like they're in that junkyard. Oh! There they are -- right in the middle of town square. Wait. What's that sound? Oh. Is that Badgerclops' laser? No. No. That's why they're not here. They're in some kind of danger! As expected, they're helpless without me!
Badgerclops And pull!
Adorabat Mmm. Extra crispy!
Mao Mao Oh, yes, of course. It all makes sense. They were probably on their way. They just got caught up fighting an ultra-powerful monster. But without my valiant assistance, they'll be trapped unless I go rescue them. I'll just sneak through town, get my clothes, then go save my team in a completely non-humiliating way. I was never naked, and you'll never prove I was!
Adorabat & Badgerclops Our hero!
Mao Mao It's a race against time. Good thing I'm fast. Done! Alright. Here we go! Lucky I landed in this...soft bed? The king! I'm gonna have to escape using the most difficult stealth technique ever conceived -- micro-wiggle!
King Snugglemagne I'm too warm! Waiter! I want my milkies!
Mao Mao The king's cape. Ha! Perfect! No, no, no, no, no, don't see me. Blast. Nakey again. At least no one is around to see!
Guard Whoa! Did you see that? Looks like a pair of floating eyes. Oh, that's right creepy, that.
Mao Mao Right! Without my clothes, I'm practically invisible. This is gonna be a piece of cake.
Guard Oh! There's only one eye, now! Two eyes, one eye, no eyes. Two eyes, one eye. Oh. Two eyes, one eye -- oh, no eyes now. Oh, well. Back to work.
Mao Mao Whatever they pay these guys is too much.
Gary What was that?
Mao Mao No! Mustn't be seen nakey!
Gary Mom! Did you hear that? Oh, peaches. I think Pinky is on the roof again!
Pinky No, I'm not! I'm in Slim's attic!
Slim Pigguns Please don't be! You're not welcome!
Muffins Can you all pretty please be quiet?
Mao Mao Ugh! Ugh! Ugh! Gah! Do these people never sleep? At this rate, I'll never get back. Badgerclops and Adorabat could be destroyed at any moment.
Adorabat Hey. Don't you think this one looks like Mao Mao?
Badgerclops I think it looks more like an upside-down butt. In fact, all of these look like upside-down butts.
Muffins Oh! I'll never get back to sleep now. The only thing that will calm me down is midnight stress-baking!
Mao Mao Ah!
Muffins What? Oh.
Slim Pigguns Time to throw out all my night trash!
Marion I can't sleep with all these barbells in my bed.
Ol' Blue Can't sleep. I got to stop drinking so much tea.
Penny It's terribly drafty. Would you close the window? Thank you.
Mao Mao Happy birthday. Keep it together, Mao Mao. Just a little while longer until we find your clothes. Alright? A little while longer until my suffering is over. Oh! Ah! Ow! Why must I be made to suffer? Maybe I should just go rescue Badgerclops and Adorabat nakey. No. Those clothes mean everything to me.
Teen Mao Mao Hot dog! Hero's clothes! Ooh!
Shin Mao Looking sharp, Mao Mao.
Teen Mao Mao Thanks, Papa. Yeah!
Mao Mao That was the closest he ever got to my actual name. I need those clothes! Ow! Ooh! Ow!
Adorabat Hey, where do you think Mao Mao has been all night?
Badgerclops I don't know. If I had to guess, he probably got all of his clothes blown off on the top of the Ruby Pure Heart, and then ran around town all naked and crazy. He's probably hiding in a thorny bush or something.
Adorabat Do you think we should check on him?
Badgerclops Yeah. That could be funny.
Mao Mao Almost there, Mao Mao. Almost there. I can see...I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Ugh! Wait. Ah! It's morning already? Adorabat and Badgerclops are probably destroyed by now! No. There's still time to save them -- right after I get my clothes. A-ha! There they are. Oh, my little clothes. I've traveled high and low, longing for your touch.
Marion Nothing like an early morning gym session. I like to get in there before the equipment gets all sticky.
Mao Mao The Sweetypies are awake! Oh, I can't be seen like this. I'll just have to move faster. Super sneak! Hasty hop, hop, hop, hop! Finally! I've missed this supple fabric. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Oh...
Pinky Hey! Let go of my ball gown!
Mao Mao Pinky! Those are my clothes! You give them. You let go right now! Let go!
Pinky No! Finders, keepers!
Mao Mao I've had a very long night, Pinky, and I am about to snap!
Pinky If you don't let go, i'll scream!
Mao Mao No! You'll attract attention. Stop.
Pinky I crave attention!
Marion That sounded like a naked body hitting water. Come on. Let's go see.
Slim Pigguns Was somebody just screaming?
Chubbum Yeah. Kind of sounded like my daddy. Daddy!
Chubbum's Dad Son, where are you going?
Mao Mao You! Ah! No! Retreat! I'm surrounded. My clothes are ruined. Badgerclops and Adorabat are probably goners.
Badgerclops How long has he been down there?
Adorabat Why are you wearing his belt on your head?
Pinky What are you, a cop?
Badgerclops You know, I'm actually not 100% sure.
Mao Mao No. I'm through hiding. I have to save my friends -- even if it means they won't see me the way I want them to. But I'm not gonna give the Sweetypies the satisfaction of mocking me! I'll beat them to the punch! That's right. I'm nakey. Why don't you take a picture? Look at my weird neck! It's just like two lines connected to an oval with no chin! It doesn't make any sense! Want to see my tail? Huh? Huh? Do you? Well, you can't, 'cause I don't even have one! I'm nakey! That's right! I'm nakey! Look at me! I'm beautiful!
Badgerclops This is the best video ever! Nobody cared but you!
Mao Mao Why didn't you try to stop me?
Badgerclops Uh, because it was hilarious.
Adorabat We're sorry, Mao Mao.
Mao Mao It's okay, Adorabat. Even through all the pain and humiliation, at least I can say I grew from this experience. You see, I learned my lesson early, but sometimes, being a hero means living your lesson to truly understand it. Say, uh, who recorded this? It's a nice-quality video. I want to congratulate them, personally, in their house.
Badgerclops I think it was Gary.
Mao Mao Neat-o. I'll be back.
Adorabat It just hit 100 views.
Gary Yes! Finally! I made something go viral!
Video Look at me! I'm beautiful!
Mao Mao Hello, Gary.
Gary No!
[END]
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